Do you remember back in the day when everyone over 5 feet tall told you “you’re too little to ride that… you’re too young to have a kitty… you can’t do that till you’re older!”

Yadda, yadda, yadda. All it made you want to do was “grow up” faster. Why does everyone call me a little kid? I’m in fifth grade.. pshh.

And then when you were a teeny-bopper going the whole, “I am an adult” route in high school, you were told “Don’t be in such a hurry to become an adult, childhood is so easy compared to adulthood.. savor your moments.”

But no, you were stubborn, and you continued to grow up.

Now, I look back upon my childhood… and a longing smile comes across my face. (haha, I say that as if it was centuries ago.)

Back in the day where school was actually a fun place to be, the playground was Heaven on Earth, and the biggest dilemma facing our lives was who could climb the fastest on the monkey bars.

I remember coming home from school… hastily finishing my Homework (yes, as soon as I came home. No, I can’t believe it either), and running outside – roller skates on feet, ready to take on any kid who would dare challenge me.

We were so creative back then. If there was no soccerball, an orange would suffice. If there was no rain, a gardening hose did the trick. If there was no volleyball net, a jump rope between two trees could hold up. We did everything and anything to achieve.. Fun.

I remember, every time I came to my cousins’ house, they would have a new intricately detailed game that they had thought up. First one to the bottom of the stairs wins! But you have to ride this puffy pillow while going down! And.. and – you need to do a handstand and then a flying kick! Oh.. and then hit the top of the ceiling facing backwards all with a cup of water in your hand! Haha… ok not that complex, but something similar. It was always fun, always challenging.. and we were always in a “zone”. At those moments, there was nothing in this dunya more important than completing the game.

Scrapes and bruises were no blemishes, but rather trophies of one’s triumphant battle with the gravel, another kid, or the bicycle. Dirty clothes signified the amount of fun and mischievous-ness that had been played out, and groundings only meant that something really bad -but soooo worth it- had gone down.

We were carefree, we had all the time in the world, and we were… for the most part… very out of tune with what Dunya really is: Hardship.

Now everything has a deadline.

Everyone is always waiting on your submission to continue the project.

Your input is needed, and if you don’t give it, the whole organization will shatter.

You forget that quiz due date, and a non-negotiable zero is sitting in your report.

There is so much demanded from us as we get older. Drama.. Fitnah… Responsibility… they all like to fill up the little breaths of air in our lives. Sometimes I wish I were a kid again… being unaccountable… being carefree…

They were right… Childhood was good.. why did we want to grow up soo fast? Come to think of it, Peter Pan was ingenious… I want to go to Neverland… Sigh.

Every now and then I try to climb a tree, dangle my feet off a balcony, kick a soccer ball… to make me feel alive again.

“Allah does not burden a soul with more than it can bear.” – Surah Baqara

Alhumdulillah. This is our test.

InshaAllah we all go to Jannah.

Reminiscing,
-Guildenstern